Last night was the one year anniversary. Guy and I, admittedly, don't have a remembered date when it all began. But this anniversary is not exactly a cherished one for me like it would be with Guy... this anniversary has me getting tipsy off handmade mimosas and unloading everything suddenly to Geneva. I feel that she and I will become very close this semester, hopefully not just because I've gone to her for asylum.
This anniversary, I decided that Harrison and I should be brother and sister- twins since neither of us really fulfills an older sibling position. It really would be one of the only ways I could view our relationship and keep it platonic in my head. Incest? ewwwww.
Things still way heavy for me. Not having Guy's love, attention and affection bothers me. I love him so yet all the signs of his love are just glimmers on my memory and on my own emotion. My heart sinks in my chest when I think of the distance between us, and this very fact has been difficult to maneuver. I want someone here to hold me. Someone to feel cared about. Yet however, I must again rely upon the warmth of friends to sustain me.
Beirut put on a good performance. Our wonderful idea to sit in the balcony left for a quieter and ...warmer concert experience. Having Sam, Noah's gf around is amazing, especially for dancing and quirky inside jokes.
I don't know why I woke up at 635 in the morning.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
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